Nine Years Ago This Evening, Tommy Was Born

I'm not alone as a father, who has been preceded by his child in death. Nope, there are many out there, and all people grieve differently, although the pain is the same. Nine years ago this evening, I was in the hospital with my wife, as she gave birth to our son Tommy. I'll never forget that night, as we were just so excited, about the little boy who was "on the way." He emerged crying, and I couldn't stop either, as he was just so beautiful. Both of us were thrilled to be parents, and the fact that it was a boy, my concerns of having to get another shotgun went clearly out the window. It was a thrilling night at Virginia Hospital Center in Arlington, Virginia, and my parents and mother-in-law, along with my brother were with us to welcome Tommy to this world.

Of course, Tommy did pass away almost four years ago. Not a single day has gone by without thinking about him. This has by no means been an easy process, and for those who haven't gone down this road, I pray that you never have to experience such pain. There are no words in English, or probably any language, to describe what its like to find your child unresponsive, to have to make their final arrangements, or put the dirt on the casket that they are interred in. Yet there have been lessons. There has been rage, tears, but at the same time, there also has been hope. So many good people have entered our lives, and stood by us at our time of need, and have continued to provide support. Thank you for that, because I wish I could express how grateful we are, but there's no way that this can be done with mere words.

Later today we are going to visit Tommy's cemetery. My parents have placed a red balloon on it, since that was his favorite color. Its hard to believe that he would be nine years old today, if he was still alive. Time flies and it doesn't, but what doesn't change, is that he is still very much in our hearts. He might be gone, but yet his legacy lives on, as we tell his younger brother all about him. This sometimes is very painful, but it must be done, because that is the best way to honor Tommy. The past few weeks have hurt, I'm not going to lie about that, but we accept that our boy is gone. I don't know what tonight will bring, nor tomorrow, nor the coming days ahead. Yet even with the tears, there is a smile, even with the heartache, there is hope. Hug your kids, and tell them how much they mean to you, because you just never know.