The death of a child is the worst event that can happen to a parent. There is so much anguish, deep pain, and so many dreams shattered that it seems impossible to pick up the pieces. Yet there is hope, and as the father of a child whom went to God far too early, I am thankful for Facebook. Yes, the social media site, that is either loved or hated, but nonetheless changed the landscape of how folks from around the world communicate. During the hardest period of time, after burying my son, Facebook became instrumental to reaching out to others, and to have people talk to me. I didn't feel like talking to people face to face, or even over the telephone. It was just too painful, and while I still continued to love folks I knew all of my life, and others that I would soon get to know through this medium, I retreated into a shell.
That was in my house. I didn't want to go out anywhere, as I worried that I would just breakdown, or run someone off of the road by my "not giving a damn." Yet through Facebook and emails, the darkest hours were at least opened by a channel on the 'net," and provided much comfort during this time of grave indignation that just seemed to linger in every inch of my consciousness. Right now, families that have gone down the same road, are being helped by Facebook. People are able to send them heartfelt condolences, messages of support, and also let them know they are not alone, even though they feel that way right now. Others whom have lost a child have told me the same thing. They didn't want to speak to anyone personally, but behind the scenes of a computer, they were able to convey their pain and commiserate with others.
Each person handles the loss of a child differently. There's no right or wrong way, as long as you don't harm anyone else or yourself. It is okay to cry, to question everything that you've held to be true, to have anger, sadness, and guilt. Each of these are completely normal, as an event of this magnitude will rip your soul apart. Yet with time, and with Facebook, you can use these tools to not be isolated. There will be times where you will want that, yet sometimes its good to touch base with others when going through such a traumatic event. Is Facebook the only internet platform? Nope, there are blogs and traditional emails, but Facebook is good due to this being able to find online support forums and resources during these times. The road to recovery is a long one, and while you shall not get over the loss of your own flesh and blood, you shall get through it. Facebook deserves kudos for the service it provides to families in grief. I am thankful for it as are many others, all across the globe.
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